The plot thickens :(

Today was my first post-op follow up at Penn with both my reconstructive surgeon and main surgeon. Everything went ok, I got another drain taken out – yay! – two down, one to go. Luckily the only one left is in my leg which is much lower on my gross-out scale than the ones in my neck. That was just next level nasty. No results yet from pathology as to whether any other lymph nodes were affected, so we will have to wait and see there. I will visit my oncologist again in a few weeks to get a treatment plan. I need to have a follow up pet scan in February for my surgeon and another follow up with him two weeks after. I need to see the reconstructive surgeon next Wednesday to (hopefully) get the drain out of my leg. And as if that wasn’t enough, turns out I do have an aneurysm in my brain. I will go see a neurosurgeon Monday at 3 to discuss all of that.

I’m having a hard time with all this. I just didn’t see it coming after the surgeon specifically told us we didn’t need to worry about that. It’s a frustrating feeling to know that 2 months ago life was “perfect” and now all this. The news just came at a bad time when I was already feeling sad about not being able to take care of the kids and have the physical closeness with them that I’m used to. Because of my leg, Sissy can’t even sit on my lap yet and Ev is hesitant to hug me cuz he’s afraid he’s gonna hurt me. Although I’m feeling really good physically, I’m now feelin a little blue. I only share all of this because when I started this I told myself I wasnt only going to post on good days. I want to be as true to this experience as possible. Physical, spiritual, emotional.

I’m now gonna make a list of a bunch of awesome things, cuz it’s my blog and I do what I want! This list is not comprehensive or in any order. Like Miley, I can’t be tamed 😉
1. My family is awesome. Both sides are so amazing and everyone’s been so supportive and helpful. It’s been so fun to have my cousins, Juli and Diana, here for a few days helping out!
2. My kids are so fun and cute. They just are.
3. Eric is the best husband everrrr. I got a keeper 4. Canada Dry Cranberry GingerAle is the bomb!! The. Bomb.


5. Reading everyone’s cards we’ve recieved makes me happy


6. God is as good as ever. He will help us figure this aaalllll out


7. Dogs are so cool.


8. Three toes sloths are cooler


9. I still look like Fat Monica. And I still think it’s hilarious. You didn’t eat my kit kats, did you??


10. They tell me the movement will come back to my bottom lip, but until it does I like making faces in the mirror


11. If it weren’t for the cancer, we may have never found the aneurysm until it was too late.

Trying to stay positive. I know there’s appropriate times to cry (which I did) and grieve and be angry with bad news, but at this point I’m so sick of myself that I just want to forget it all for a little. So tonight, we watch Pitch Perfect and relax 🙂

Advertisements

10 thoughts on “The plot thickens :(

  1. Kim,

    I am still praying for you EVERY day! Funny…I don’t think we’ve ever spoken in person, yet I feel so compelled to pray for you and your precious family. I look expectantly for your blog posts so I know how to pray for you specifically. Thanks for taking the time and energy to write down your thoughts and feelings. While I know it’s probably very hard, I also know that one day, when you get to look back on all this crap, you’ll be glad you did. You are a very strong woman, even though you may not feel like it. You have been such an inspiration to so many people already…..and I’m sure there will be many more, as you take this journey. Please know that you are thought of often throughout the day and are prayed for the hardest I know how! God Is Still Doing Great Things…I will always refer back to this song I used to sing with the choir at church. Go take a listen…you may even remember it. Cling to it. Believe it. Receive it. You are loved, Kim! Jen

    1. Thank you Jen! I have been blown away by the amount of people who are burdened for us in this situation and just so grateful to have people like you praying for us!! I’m not sure where this journey will take us but I am sure of who is with us. And you’re right, He is still doing great things! 🙂

  2. I cry every time I read your blog for all of the times I have felt sorry for myself. You are such an inspiration. Thanks for posting.

  3. Kim,
    I want you to know that we are praying for you daily here at Ephrata Church of the Nazarene. Our hearts go out to you and your family. I know our Jesus has the power of healing and that is what we are praying for you! Bless you and your family. I share your blogs with our staff each time you post and that helps us to know how to pray for you. Thank you! We also mention you in our services for prayer as well. I must say, you are an amazing writer! You really should consider writing a book or publications of some kind… Well, that’s what I think anyway…and many others as well. Just wanted you to know that you are being lifted up to the Lord in prayer. Hang in there. God bless you.
    Pastor Rocky Hambrick

    1. Thank you so much!! We have been really humbled by all the people who are burdened for our situation. It’s been quite an experience! We can’t really put into words how much we appreciate your prayer support and help for our family. And thanks for your kind words about my writing, I’m glad if there’s something people can connect to 🙂

  4. I wanted you to know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I know the Andrews from the Nazarene church and remember Eric as a boy. I have been reading your blog and I am touched by your brave and heart that just keeps praising the Lord no matter what comes your way. You are an inspiration to those around you and you help me remember to trust in God no matter what. I don’t know you but you are a very strong woman! Remember when times get rough that He is holding you and there for you and your family.
    Prayers

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s