Today was my first post-op follow up at Penn with both my reconstructive surgeon and main surgeon. Everything went ok, I got another drain taken out – yay! – two down, one to go. Luckily the only one left is in my leg which is much lower on my gross-out scale than the ones in my neck. That was just next level nasty. No results yet from pathology as to whether any other lymph nodes were affected, so we will have to wait and see there. I will visit my oncologist again in a few weeks to get a treatment plan. I need to have a follow up pet scan in February for my surgeon and another follow up with him two weeks after. I need to see the reconstructive surgeon next Wednesday to (hopefully) get the drain out of my leg. And as if that wasn’t enough, turns out I do have an aneurysm in my brain. I will go see a neurosurgeon Monday at 3 to discuss all of that.
I’m having a hard time with all this. I just didn’t see it coming after the surgeon specifically told us we didn’t need to worry about that. It’s a frustrating feeling to know that 2 months ago life was “perfect” and now all this. The news just came at a bad time when I was already feeling sad about not being able to take care of the kids and have the physical closeness with them that I’m used to. Because of my leg, Sissy can’t even sit on my lap yet and Ev is hesitant to hug me cuz he’s afraid he’s gonna hurt me. Although I’m feeling really good physically, I’m now feelin a little blue. I only share all of this because when I started this I told myself I wasnt only going to post on good days. I want to be as true to this experience as possible. Physical, spiritual, emotional.
I’m now gonna make a list of a bunch of awesome things, cuz it’s my blog and I do what I want! This list is not comprehensive or in any order. Like Miley, I can’t be tamed 😉
1. My family is awesome. Both sides are so amazing and everyone’s been so supportive and helpful. It’s been so fun to have my cousins, Juli and Diana, here for a few days helping out!
2. My kids are so fun and cute. They just are.
3. Eric is the best husband everrrr. I got a keeper 4. Canada Dry Cranberry GingerAle is the bomb!! The. Bomb.
5. Reading everyone’s cards we’ve recieved makes me happy
6. God is as good as ever. He will help us figure this aaalllll out
7. Dogs are so cool.
8. Three toes sloths are cooler
9. I still look like Fat Monica. And I still think it’s hilarious. You didn’t eat my kit kats, did you??
10. They tell me the movement will come back to my bottom lip, but until it does I like making faces in the mirror
11. If it weren’t for the cancer, we may have never found the aneurysm until it was too late.
Trying to stay positive. I know there’s appropriate times to cry (which I did) and grieve and be angry with bad news, but at this point I’m so sick of myself that I just want to forget it all for a little. So tonight, we watch Pitch Perfect and relax 🙂