So here it is, the brain tumor:
It looks like it’s in my left side, but it’s actually in my right side. It also explains my episode yesterday and why my peripheral vision is bad still in my left eye.
This post won’t be very well written or thought out, just want to get info out to everyone that’s praying for us and waiting to hear, we are actually driving home from Penn as I write this. I will be getting gamma knife radiation on Tuesday. That involves an early morning MRI, getting my head screwed into a device (will have small scars on my forehead and the back of my head), and them pumping large amounts of radiation directly into the tumor. It’s just a day procedure luckily and I should be able to go home that day with minimal side effects. The hope is that it kills the tumor, he said there’s about an 80-90% success rate after a year. I will have to get MRIs every 2 months for the rest of my life. The neurosurgeon said when he was younger he would have jumped right to surgery, but since the tumor is imbedded 3 inches deep into my occipital lobe (visual center of brain) that would mean definitely losing the sight in my left eye and he said that would mean no driving and he didn’t want to jump to that. So after he decided on the gamma knife procedure, he sent us to see a radiation oncologist who was super nice and super helpful about how the procedure would go. The bad news is that he gave us the impression that based on what he’s seeing this is just the beginning of chasing around tumors as they pop up for the rest of my life. He didn’t say it exactly, but seemed to be relaying that this seems pretty aggressive.
So that’s where we are at now. I’m not sure if I want to cry (more) or throw up or both. Thank you all so much for all of your sweet texts and comments and messages, I have read most all of them, just haven’t had time to respond to all, but please know it’s so appreciated. I don’t feel very strong or positive right now, quite the opposite actually. So if you came here looking for strength, wisdom, or inspiration, I’m sorry I just don’t have any of that right now.
What makes a bad day worse? Traffic on the Schuylkill when all I want after a very long day is to be home with my babies. Oh, life!!