Not sure that I can even explain my feelings right now. It’s been a really amazing Christmas so far and I am just so grateful to still be here. It’s so unbelievably magical to celebrate this Christmas with my babies, my hunky hubby, and our families!
There’s a part of me that feels a twinge of sadness though with every giggle, every time we sing a song from Frozen, every reaction to a present, every sweet kiss and happy cuddle and silly comment because I can’t help but wonder if I’ll be here for it next year. I feel like I am on the verge of bursting into tears at any given moment at the overwhelming mix of joy and sadness and my motivation for doing most of the things I do now is the hope of my kids making memories that include me.
But for the most part, I just feel love and joy, and gratitude to God for the blessings that He has continued to give us. He has consistently and without fail provided for us in every possible way, and it melts my heart that my kids are beginning to put that all together. Thanks to everyone who’s been praying and has been so generous to us this Christmas season, it’s been surreal to have so much support and love.
I wasn’t supposed to be here for this. Take that, cancer! You lost this round…